The War

There are some days when my head, the rational side of me, and my heart, the moral and emotional side of me, war to no end. They won't stop fighting and yelling and debating about anything and everything. I spend my minutes and days in some emotional turnmoil from the small battles being waged within me. Should I or should I not? Can I or can I not? Is this okay or is it against the rules? And what are the rules? Do I follow them because everyone else is? Have I lost sight of the goal because it seems that I'm the only one looking at it? Sometimes the black and white suddenly all looks so gray and it takes me a moment, or several moments, to realign my focus. And when I do, it seems that I've already messed things up.

Sometimes I wish I could be more emotional or more rational...one of the two...because the war between is sometimes too heavy.